Good Stuff.

Happy Tuesday all! Hope your weekends were wonderful. I spent mine in the city spending and drinking too much but it was just what I needed. The weather was perfect. Saturday took a walk with a friend through Central Park and it was so therapeutic. We saw 4 brides which reaffirmed my already well in place dreams of a fall wedding. The weather was just perfect and they all looked stunning. I'll take one Virginia winery wedding in October, please. Ironically enough yesterday I was wearing an olive green shirt and my eggplant colored Tory B*urch Revas, the color combination that I would use for this would be somewhere off in the distant distant future wedding. And then I ate a lunch consisting of mostly green foods, which was just plain creepy. Haha.

*Any Gossip Girl fans out there? Am I the only one confused as to who this guy is that is in prison and trying to take down Serena and company? I feel like I missed a vital chunk of information somewhere.


*Also, I cannot remember who blogged about these previously but my lovely new bookshelf is in need of the pretty canvas books that Ant*hropologie sells but I remember someone mentioning getting them on Amazon... Any ideas as to who publishes them?

 *ETA - anyone who is curious, they are the Penguin Classics. Just ordered Little Women and Great Expectations from Amazon!

thank God its friday night...

And at midnight I will be paid! Thank you direct deposit! This week has been dragging on and on. On Tuesday I was talking to a client and telling her I would speak with her again on Monday because it legitimately felt like Friday. Ugh. Last night was stellar. My friend M's mom got her tickets to see the SYTYCD Tour at Radio City. It was so amazing. I danced for the better part of my youth, nowhere near the caliber that it takes to dance on television obviously {or I may not be sitting at this desk right now} but every time I see them dancing I always have this slight urge to pick it back up. Tap was always my favorite. Maybe I could find an adult tap class somewhere? Haha, wouldn't that be a trip. Tonight I am going to head back into the city and see some friends. I literally haven't been here in three weekends. Last weekend I was in Virginia for a hair appointment, {Do not judge me for this. I love my stylist and it took me A LONG TIME to get her to know exactly how to do my hair and I really can't even think about starting that over}, the weekend before I was in Boston visiting a friend from home, and the weekend before that we took a quick trip back to College Memory Lane, PA. The weather was absolutely perfect last night so I am looking forward to a nice autumn weekend in New York City. Perhaps I will snap some photos? I realized that one of the big reasons I have never shown you guys pictures is that I NEVER TAKE ANY! I almost always have my camera and I just don't take many pictures. I have resolved to work on this a million times over and yet I think I have the least tagged photos on F*acebook out of everyone I know. 

In light of everything that I have been working through lately, as I was getting ready for work tomorrow I really stopped and thought about it all. I am exactly where I wanted to be... I might have had help along the way but this is MY accomplishment. I may not be completely financially dependent but I am closer to being on my own than not. I have a job that I enjoy in this awful economic state that we are in. Maybe not a total Op*rah moment {she is a goddess in my eyes}, but definitely a mini ah-ha. 

Stay tuned next week for the apartment tour! Youve already seen the bathroom but there is more to come and I NEED ADVICE! Lots of empty walls, but I don't want things to get too busy and all that, but we will cross that bridge when we get there. 

Hope you all have fabulous Fall weekends! I am so excited to bust out my scarves! Ah! :)

Wee Bit!

Hopping on the Wee Bit of Me Wednesday train this week! Here goes...



{one} grilled or fried?grilled. i try to stay away from fried food but sometimes its just too yummy!
{two} if you could change one thing about where you live, without worrying about money, what would you change?i just moved into my apartment about a month ago so i dont think i would change much! i need to get something to hang over my couch though, the wall is huge and bare.
{three} what is your favorite time of day?i am definitely a night owl. especially now that i have a huge window, the night time view of the skyline is awesome!
{four} what’s your favorite cereal?i have never eaten a bowl of cereal with milk in my life. im weird, i know. but i do like the kashi go-lean almond flax cereal, i usually have that with vanilla yogurt for breakfast.
{five} do you open your mouth when you put mascara on?yessss.
{six} if you could make any fictional character come to life, which would it be?don draper, but only if he would love me and ONLY me and we all know that he is not capable of that.
{seven} what are your favorite pizza toppings?pepperoni and veggie. i did have a stellar meatball and ricotta pizza last night though, YUM YUM!
{eight} are you a heavy or a light sleeper?i would say medium... i usually stay asleep through the night but sometimes my internal clock wakes me up.
{nine} what is your favorite board game?anyone else remember dream phone?! i loved it. "he is NOT at the mall."
{ten} what star/celebrity do most people say you look like?jordin sparks. i dont agree with that one though.

Tell Me What You Like About Yourself

Such a dreaded question. I kind of cringed even typing it out, but that is what was asked of me last night. And I really am not sure how to answer it. Then she asked me what my friends would say about me, and when I said I wish I knew she suggested I ask. So there you have it, my therapy homework assignment. So I awkwardly went about asking my besties "Why are you my friend?" The thing that hurt me the most was when I talked to my mom she said "Well don't put down that you're a good sister." I know that my siblings and I have gotten in arguments over the years. WHO HASN'T?! I think my sister has this unattainable idea of us frolicking through the pansies together and never fighting. That's called unrealistic. We are too close in age, too alike, while also being too different to get along perfectly all the time. And that's completely boring anyways. A lot of you have been saying that I shouldn't be so hard on myself but I've always been my toughest critic. I would cry in second grade when I didn't finish my timed multiplication quizzes. I had to do everything right all. the. time. And as you can see, a lot of that self criticism comes from the criticism from my mother.  I know she knows a lot about me and that she doesn't sugar coat things, but that doesn't stop her words from stinging every now and again. So I decided that I will be putting on my list, along with whatever else I come up with between now and next week, that I am the sister I know how to be, and that's the best I can do.

ETA: This blog will not be turning into a self help column, that I can promise and assure you.

Today.

I dont really know what I thought I would gain out of writing this blog, but I can assure you that it was never support from people that I had never, and possibly would never meet. Thank you for the kind words on my last post. Tonight is my second session with my therapist and I really think that this is going to be a positive step for me. As crazy as it my sound, I can already tell that I am thinking and feeling more and asking those tough questions that need to be asked of yourself during a time like this. How did I get here? Where am I going to go from here? I think I have been hovering over the possibility of what this blog can be, and quite possibly who I can be. I don't know that I have been my true authentic self on here and I think if I let the walls down, this could actually be a great vehicle on my path to wherever it is that I am going. So today, not sure why today, but I want to rip off the blogging band-aid and just be me. So this is me.